Dear you. Yes, I do.

The mysterious end of that season
I think, did I really love you?
Somewhere, all those times that we were together
I look back to those times, as if I could touch it, as if it was yesterday

Each moment, I think of you
That voice that quietly rang with a low tone
Even your resemblance to the spring sunlight
You always brightly shined on my day

Each moment, I think of you
That voice that quietly rang with a low tone
Even your resemblance to the spring sunlight
Even the small memories are still so clear

The mysterious end of that season
I think, did I really love you?
Somewhere, all those times that we were together
I look back to those times, as if I could touch it, as if it was yesterday

Each moment, I think of you
That voice that quietly rang with a low tone
Even your resemblance to the spring sunlight
You always brightly shined on my day

Each moment, I think of you
That voice that quietly rang with a low tone
Even your resemblance to the spring sunlight
Even the small memories are still so clear

Where are we?
I look back at all those memories
Were we happy?
Only unknown feelings remain in the same place

Each moment, I think of you
That voice that quietly rang with a low tone
Even your resemblance to the spring sunlight
I still haven’t forgotten you

Where are we?
Were we happy?

Dear you, 

The year is ending. That means 3 months of not talking to you. Not knowing if you’re alive or not. If you’re sick, if you have eaten, if you’re cold… I’m just rambling now aren’t I? 

You left without a word. Left me by myself. When I needed you the most. I crumbled into dust. 

I should be angry. I am, actually. Who wouldn’t be? 

But you know that I’m not the kind to hate someone without knowing from that person himself. That’s why I want to know.

Why did you leave? 

Why are you watching me from afar? 

Why are you so okay watching me hurt all over? 

You know where I am. Know where I’m waiting. Why didn’t you come? 

It didn’t have to be public. Nothing we ever did was very public anyway. 

Why do you miss me and not want to do anything about it? 

What’s happening? 

私はまだあなたを愛しています。

Don’t leave me hanging anymore. 

Let’s start the new year a new and start thing over.

大丈夫?

Cherie.

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What I’ve been up to this term break.

After my term tests I had a very much needed two weeks break. I say much needed because I barely made it through the term. But who really bothers about that. I’m freeeee.

But within the first weekend. My phone gave way. Again. For like the seventh time this year and half year. I’ve serviced it so many times I know exactly what is wrong with it. I’ve been there so many times the people know me by name. I’ve been there so many times that their once good tasting teh tarik makes me feel sick.

I went there with my aunty intending for it to get fixed on the spot. I told them that I wanted it to be fixed on the spot. Telling them I only needed the soldering triple enforced. But NOOOOO. They take one look at in and tell me that they will have to keep it. So there, I was left with no phone again.

Of course I was pissed.  I was beyond pissed.  I was flaming furious. I glared at the guy till I swore he flinched. Got up and told aunty that we were heading to Chinatown because I was getting a new phone. And that was exactly what I did. I marched into a Samsung store and blew half of my savings. After which I went home to configure and charge it. All in a day’s work.

But that’s just one thing I’ve done this holiday. Christmas was on its way as well and I was over at momo’s helping her and her mom bake chocolate rum brownies.

They were the best things on earth. So comforting.

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They don’t look too appetizing, I know. But you shouldn’t judge a food by it’s looks. Unless it smells bad.

While we’re still on the topic of Christmas, I also met my niece!

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I’m an aunt! How time flies. I’m not even 20 and someone will be calling me aunty Cherie already. ):

Here’s a photo of my family’s Christmas gathering’s food.

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Yup. It was a shit ton of food. Till today, I’m till eating the leftovers.

Also, my dad, who used to be retired, also found a job he enjoys. It was kind of a big thing because the whole family had pretty much gotten used to him being home all the time. Because you know, that’s what people who are retired do.

He now helps run a coffeeshop at simpang bedok market. Especially the beer garden. He really is having so much fun and it’s really good to see. Not to mention he keeps bringing my sister, brother in law and I over to show off.

This is my youngest one. Very tall right?

This is my second one. SIA stewardess. And that’s my son in law. Very filial!

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Yup. That’s my dad, my sister and momo.

Presents and reactions.

I don’t really tell people what I get but this one really made my day. It’s actually from my friend in office. He’s more senior to me but he pays a lot of attention to how people are and feel around him.

He got me this activity book to fill up and do as homework everyday. Because he noticed that I’m unoccupied most of the time and tend to think up a lot of negativity. I’m only allowed to do one page a day so I have to make the most of that one activity. He even got me colour gel pens to write with because he noticed that my pencil box was left with only mechanical and wooden pencils.

See?! It’s the thought that counts and his present really had a lot of thought put into it! I’m touched man. Taken care of like a little sister. Best present of the year goes to him.

My sister found it, decided to camwhore with it and since it was mine, I had to too.

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She also decided that I had to take more pictures since my phone’s camera finally had some sort of quality.

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Don’t we look alike 😀

Hmm… what else did I do?

Oh right.

I ate.

And ate.

And ate and ate and ate.

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Was over at wild honey again. I love that place. It’s the bomb. It costs a bomb too but once in a while it’s okay.

The place is so homely and the food is so awesome. It makes me so happy I’m the sperm that won. Like I’ll be chewing my food and thinking. So this is what they mean by “live to eat”. Hurhurhur.

After the sinful meal, we went to buy some stuff. Ian wanted to get body lotion for his sister and I needed to get masks for my face. My faceeeeeeee.

While I was in dhoby ghaut, I remembered that one of my friends was working and decided to go spy on him.

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He’s the one in black. You should have seen his face when he saw/caught me. Priceless.
That’s it for the two weeks. Been very busy. Working and trying to straighten myself out.

Better be off to sleep.

Beauty sleep doesn’t sleep itself!

Cherie

It’s cold – Epik High

Spring comes and flowers bloom
Summer comes and memories melt but…

The four seasons don’t suit me well, I’m a cold person
My hard personality is like the skin-cutting winter
The cold wind – you all know
To me, coldness is everything, it’s like the winter sea
Send a boat off and you’ll see that I’m not an island but an iceberg
I lost my focus because my eyes are frosted
The cold memories have been trampled
I keep screaming even without my uvula
I was an icy road with only painful scars remaining
My heart crumbled as if an avalanche came down
After I put things back in place
The lights were off and it was night
Though the sun called you has risen
The snow-covered mountain does not melt

It’s cold here even when I hide my hands in my pocket
It’s so cold even when I blow into my hands
My heart is so frozen that my lips get cracked

I’m the only cold one even when I wrap my body in blankets
It’s so cold even when I’m in someone’s embrace
I try to block the hole in my heart but the wind keeps coming in

The spring comes with a fluttering heart
But I’m standing at the tip of fall
My memories have stopped in the winter
I’ve put all the warmth in between the cracked skin of my dried heart
Memories are trapped inside the frozen river
But it holds onto me and doesn’t let go of my hand
After I got to know the cold separation
The blooming spring doesn’t come anymore
Cherry blossoms fall like snowflakes, it’s cold here
Sunshine falls like a snowstorm, it’s only cold for me
If I touch anything, it freezes so I’m afraid to hold your hand
Because if you come close to me, your heart might catch a cold too

It’s cold here even when I hide my hands in my pocket
It’s so cold even when I blow into my hands
My heart is so frozen that my lips get cracked

I’m the only cold one even when I wrap my body in blankets
It’s so cold even when I’m in someone’s embrace
I try to block the hole in my heart but the wind keeps coming in

I’m cold as ice. I’m cold as ice. I’m cold as ice. So cold.

Spring comes and flowers bloom
Summer comes and memories melt but here…

It’s cold here, it’s so cold
My heart is so frozen that my lips get cracked

It’s only cold for me, it’s so cold
I try to block the hole in my heart but the wind keeps coming in

 

The Singaporean that toured Singapore

Sooooo. This is going to be a very rushed and short post.

A very delayed one as well.

Can you believe it? Just this year, I visited my country’s CBD and financial district. Tourist attractions too. I have many excuses.

“I’m a local. Why would I go for tourist traps?”

“Why do I have to go there? It’s for tourists.”

I thought the above reasons were fairly reasonable, till I had to go for my CDS field trip and have an FT tell me more about my own country. I don”t even know about politics and these guys already know were all the new buildings in Singapore were going to be built, why and how.

On a more encouraging note, they did talk a little bit about sustainability, which is relevant to my course. But who cares right? Not like I’m going to be doing that in future.

Moving on.

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I was actually pretty fascinated by this lake-within-a-shopping-mall thing. Given, it was 9am in the morning and none of the shops were open, but it did give me a chance to take this picture with only one guy photo bombing it.
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Thought I’d act like a tourist since I really felt like one. Who knew that my country’s skyline would look so nice an calming? It was a nice day out too. Not too hot and a little windy!

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In event of the new year, these inflated balls have been everywhere. From outside my school’s library, to my neighbourhood shopping center and now this. Might as well right?
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Decided to try and be a model. This is why I’m working service crew and not as a model.

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Royally photo bombed.
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After everything, we went over to Lao Pa Sat to have lunch and we split from there. Went back to get decorating on my Polaroid album.

This is how it turned out.

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Alright, gotta run. Going to work because it’s the holidays again! (although only for a while)

xoxo,

Cherie.