Dreaming Big

When I grow up, I don’t want to be in Singapore. I want to work in an office. A big, posh, polished office, with a really pretty view. I imagine it to be really high up. Up with the other important offices, sharing that same important city skyline. We’ll do all that grown up stuff, like slacking off, complaining about our boss and having $7 coffees. I’ll take part in gossip, maybe start a trend.

When I grow up, I’ll be studying overseas. I’ll live in a hostel by myself, maybe have a room mate. I’ll actually be afraid to walk the streets at night and hate my room mate’s guts. On short term breaks where I can’t return home, I’ll receive thin mints from the family, half year supplies of green tea from my friends and ‘Come back soon’ cards. Cards which I would reply with a cringe-worthy postcard that says ‘Wish you were here!’, and I’ll be on my merry way. Maybe I’ll attract a jock, get into trouble with Queen-bitch bimbos and launch into a mid-life crisis because ‘the goth life chose me’. I’ll make a queer group of friends and we’ll do artsy things like watch plays and actually enjoy museum visits. We’ll be weird around each other. We’ll have the weirdest OCDs and not care. We’ll have quirky personalities, wear quirky shoes and buy quirky things. We’d be that real life cast of ‘F.R.I.E.N.D.S’.

When I grow up, I’ll have my own job and rent my own apartment. I’ll worry about grown up things, like bills, meals and what happened on Pretty Little Liars last episode. I’ll fight a shopping addiction; maybe even write my own book. My apartment would be really clean, mainly because I wouldn’t have money to buy any kind of furniture, and my closet would be filled with thrift store steals. But it’s okay, because I’ll probably figure out how to look hot in them, one way or another. And somehow, just somehow, I’ll own a car. A pretty fire-engine red mini cooper that screams ‘FUN, FUN, FUN, Classy.’

When I grow up, I’ll experience all the four seasons. From freeze-my-butt-off winter, to let-me-run-around-naked summer. I’ll shovel the snow, rake the leaves and apply the sunscreen. I’ll get to go caroling, leaf diving and swimming. I’ll bake seasonal pies and Christmas cookies. I’ll work jobs I never got to work, like snow-shoveling and mowing lawns, organize campfires in the autumn, swimming in lakes during the spring and snoozing by the beach in hammocks when summer comes round.

When I grow up, I’ll do crazy things. I’ll go cliff hoping, busking and mosh-pit surfing or get really sick by myself at home and enjoy it. I might even sass a racist dude and get chased all the way out of that part of town, or pretend I’m an escaped North Korean for a day. I’d accept candy from a stranger just to see his reaction or spray paint an anime character on a wall. Then I’ll get a part time job at a zoo and take care of birds of paradise. I might even start a band that does acoustic, indie, jazz and pop covers.

When I grow up, I’ll fall in love. I’ll find the man who will make me nervous with just his presence. His hand would fit mine perfectly, like two jigsaw puzzles. His touch would set my skin on fire and make the little hairs at the back of my neck stand. Anything he does will make me happy, whether it’s something stupid or embarrassing. He’ll be the man I’ll actually allow take me long walks on the beach, candle lit dinners, kiss me under a mistletoe and pick me from school or work. He’ll be the man who understands and accepts all of me; my other half, my soul mate.

And when I’ve grown up, I’ll go home. Back to Singapore. No, I wouldn’t necessarily stay, but I’ll be back there. My IC may not be pink anymore, and I’d have a bit of an accent. There may be ring on my finger by then, but I’ll go home, to my family. My expanding family. My hair would be done up in a simple french twist and I’d be an a simple navy blue skater dress. Arm in arm with the love of my life, I’ll go home to my nieces or nephews who eagerly await my return. They’ll hound me for stories of what I did overseas. The people I met and the crazy things I’d done. And I will be a teacher to them. I will show them that.

No dream is too far fetched, everyone can dream and anyone can make their dreams come true. As long as they constantly fight and reach for it.


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