How nice that my very first post of the year is about school. New Years Eve was a total drag for very private matters, besides the fact that I’ve been bleeding from my birthday all the way through Christmas and New Years. I almost forgot to do a 40% assignment of mine for Civic and Moral education and since I was in such a bad mood then (New Year’s Eve) my essay was pretty bitchy if I say so myself.
THIS IS A QUEUED POST.
But enjoy anyway.
Assignment was submitted without gifs because my student portal doesn’t gifs.
What are some successes or failures that you experienced
during your journey?
I would have to describe my life in TP, at the very least to be, tragic. I would like to say more, but when faced with such an irritatingly optimistic question, my mind is blank.
If there is anything at all to recall, it would be my struggles academically with my course modules. Since I am but vaguely interested in my course -if not none at all- I never excelled in any module but presentation and writing skills.
All my failures had been painfully literal, be it in simple class questions, term tests and if I were really unlucky, main examinations. Success had been a far cry for me, even when I was graded a ‘B’ for my Engineering Mathematics. Competition is natural, especially in a city that believes so blindly in meritocracy – a lowly ‘B’ can’t possibly hold any form of light to a glittering ‘Z’.
What have you learnt from your participation in the various
activities of your life journey?
Naturally introverted, I haven’t had much interest in participating in anything but family affairs and if I were to participate in anything at all, I never brought home much to be desired. For instance:
-Camps had taught me that not every camp your parents force you to attend would be a leadership camp filled with team bonding activities and not every corner of a school is haunted.
-Project work showed me how much of a pushover I was.
Main examinations proved to me that even though I was a pushover, I wasn’t a very good one at that.
-Having to mix with people I deeply resent taught me the difference between being tolerant and fake. Mostly, it’d taught me restraint (from sabotaging the squirt) and patience (in hopes that they would stop their nonsense).
What have you discovered about yourself and others?
As a person who has written much about her frustrations when it comes to majority of people she has met in school, my life revolves around the friends that I make and keep.
For people who would first meet me on the concourse of TP without a formal introduction, I would come across as painfully boring. I do not find the need to put as much effort into acquaintances as I find them virtually useless in the future. Of course, making a good impression and not enemies are a given but I never intend to go further than that.
Besides how I meticulously chose who I mixed with, I am confident in saying that when I decide to put effort into a friendship, I give it my all, especially since I have few but close friends. I will always be loyal and supportive of them no matter what situation, through thick and thin; also supporting my above point of being a total pushover.
As I meet more people, I have discovered that people will take advantage of you at any given chance, hence why I take my time when choosing my friends.
How do you feel about standing up for your belief and conviction?
Did you face any difficulty? What have you learnt?
I am often reprimanded for what I believe in and how I write. You could say that I am a dead writer refusing to admit defeat in a sea of numbers, cursing the world for what has happened to me and what I have perpetually landed myself into, but hey. At least I’m still cursing and I guess to a certain extent, I am not quite as dead as I feel.
I believe that I should never stop writing. If anything, I must strive to become better with every post I write and as long as what I write is not damaging in anyway, I am free to do so.
As long as no one can convince me other wise, I will always be right. This is the way I learn -From falling and getting up over and over again. It is something this school has subjected me to time and time again and though I am ever bitter over it, I have no choice but to thrive in the only thing I am provided with.