Chinese New Year FAQS’14

Another year, another round of the same old questions. Your relatives ask if you’re dating anyone while your cousins ask and wait around for you to get married. It’s the same food, same houses and same shit (well except for the red packets) every year. Don’t you ever get tired of answering the same things over and over again? Especially when you’re like me, picky as hell and forever alone.

So here are my list of CNY FAQS! Honestly, I hope my answers change in time to come, if not, I’m not going to see cool and aloof but pathetic and alone.


Q: Do you have a boyfriend?
A: No.

Q: Do you want a boyfriend?
A: No.

Q: What happened to Sydney boy?
A: He died.

Q: So do you like anyone right now?
A: No / I may tell you about Bus stop boy if I like you enough.

Q: So right now you’re in what again?
A: Poly, Temasek. It’s in Tamppines.

Q: What are you studying?
A: Green Building and Sustainability

Q: And it’s a…?
A: Engineering.

Q: How is school?
A: Like that lor.

Q: When are you graduating?
A: Soon enough.

Q: So I hear you get cheaper concession now.
A: Yes, it’s great, thank you.

Q: What do you want to be when you grow up?
A: An Editor.

Q: Why can’t I touch your phone?
A: Porn.

Q: Wanna play cards?
A: The minimum bet is two bucks.

Q: What are you going to do with your life?
A: I don’t know but somewhere down the line the answer is 42.

Q: Have you eaten?
A: I am sitting at the dining table.

Q: Why are you making an FAQ?
A: Because people need to start asking me more creative questions.

What is your list of CNY FAQS? Make one and link me over in the comments section!

Cheers! I mean,

Huat ah!


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